After I gave up on another return ticket, I finally stayed an extra eight days at Master Fu’s Yangshuo Taichi and Kungfu School. It was not reasonable, but the calling was too strong. I just had to stay. Thank you, Intuition, my best friend, for being once again so much right about everything.

Those eight days were crucial. Totally intense. That’s the least I can say about them.

In these eight days, I finally managed to get ’un-stuck’ and find my taichi back. Of course the path and process of learning are still endless, but I’m definitely back on track now. Not only did I go back to feeling and loving taichi, but this time, my stay at the taichi school was a real awakening in many aspects of my life.

For the past four months, I had been stuck in a kind of limbo, not being able to practice any taichi, feeling miserable about my job, becoming bitter, starting to lose faith in humanity and even having the fantasy of smashing some people’s heads against the wall… Not a good sign.

Being back at the taichi school, I was reminded that originally, I’m not full of hatred, but rather the opposite. I don’t know how the magic works over there, but somehow, Yangshuo, the school, its people – coaches and students – create an atmosphere in which I feel so much at peace that I can allow myself to just be. And when I return to the core of my inner self, I reconnect with my spirituality and this is when I manage to help people by just being myself. Whether through the use of energy healing techniques that I learnt, or the inspiration of my story and experience… or my writing.

I almost died of surprise and disbelief when, chitchatting with my new schoolmates, we randomly discovered  that they actually came to Yangshuo because they read my blog. Three of my new Taichi Brothers were looking for a school in China to learn martial arts and decided to pick Master Fu’s one because they either saw a video of me doing taichi, or were thrilled by my live testimonials, or were touched by my words when I talked about Master Fu, the man. I believe what convinced all three of them was the authenticity of the material presented in my blog.

My schoolmates were as amazed to meet me for real as I was struck by emotion to realize that my writing could actually impact the others, that there are now people who make the decision to come to the school because of my words… that maybe they are giving a new turn to their lives the same way taichi did to me.

Another lesson I learnt this time: when you are true to yourself and care for the others, with sincerity and compassion, they give it back to you a hundredfold by showering you with love.

Special thanks to the Taichi Brothers and Sisters who accompanied me in my journey this time: Laetitia, Phounkeo, Emilie, Tina, Lorraine, James and Yuval. Thank you for giving me the space to be myself and for making me want to be a better person. 

The title of this post is one of my favorite quotes. And its author, my biggest hero: my dad.                         

October 2010: I set foot in the Yangshuo Taichi and Kungfu School for the first time ever. I was supposed to just ask for directions. Instead, I stay for a week, extend my trip, change my flight ticket.

January 2011: Coming back to the Taichi School for the second time. After a month of training, when comes the day to fly back to an unpromising future in Shanghai, I have this gut feeling which tells me that I shouldn’t leave. It’s quite an uncomfortable sensation, having to make a decision which involves a certain amount of money when I’m already in a critical financial situation.  But the call is too loud. I choose to stay and give up on my return flight ticket. This will change my life.

October 2012: Time has passed and having spent around a year at Master Fu’s school, I have gone back to Shanghai to make money before I go in the red. But in October 2012, I come back to the Taichi School to freshen up my practice. This time, after few days, I just can’t stand being there for some reason. My soul has to be in Shanghai. I decide to fly back earlier than planned. Again, I give up on my return ticket.

December 2012: Instead of enjoying a heavenly vacation in Bali which I’ve booked much in advance, I chose to fly to France to mourn. Another ticket lost.

May 6th, 2013: Having spent 10 days at the Taichi School, I’m supposed to fly back to Shanghai in the evening to fulfill my professional and social duty in the upcoming days. But that gut feeling is back… again. I don’t want to leave the school. I shouldn’t leave.  I CAN’T leave. Within an hour, I make several phone calls and manage to sort out the professional matter. I sit down, take a deep breath and can have a proper chat with my Inner Self:

‘Was it worth all the trouble and money (giving up on a return ticket AGAIN!!)?’ I ask him.

‘Remember what your dad taught you?’ my Inner Self replies.

‘Money comes and goes. But moments in life and opportunities just happen once.’

Yes I remember and yes it is worth all the trouble and every yuan of it.

It’s not a waste of money if the expenditure is for you to change the course of things and be able to say one day, ‘I have no regret’.

I also like the idea that the plane took off so many times without me and that the passenger who was supposed to be my neighbor on board gets to enjoy more space for himself :)

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